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Happy Divorce Chocolate Bar - $8.50
A huge piece of chocolate to make anyone smile during the worst of times.
Gift boxed, tied with stretch ribbon, 6 ounces. Requires cooler pack
during warm months.

Inflatable Wife - $13.80 Sale!
$12.00
Totally silent, wastes no time, spends no money, toilet seat is
always up, won't crash your cart, totally faithful and she floats. About 3
1/2 feet tall. No holes, wears a little yellow outfit. Hilarious
instruction manual included.
More Female Dolls

Inflatable Husband - $13.80 Sale!
$12.00
All your friends will like him, won't upset your parents, always willing to
please, doesn't watch football, never breaks wind, always faithful and he
floats. About 3 1/2 feet tall, wears shorts.
Hilarious instruction manual included.
More Male Dolls

Alimony Checks to Her from Him - $5.00 Pre
Written alimony checks with three sayings. Checks are made out to:
Pay to the of Lying Selfish Whore, Cold Heartless Bitch and Cause of All My Pain
in the amount of Every Last Friggin' Cent! There are about 24 checks in
each pack. Just date and sign, pre-ass wiped at no extra cost, saves lots
of time!

Ex Wife Toilet Paper - $4.50
Brighten your day while you wipe away. Flush your way to
mental well being. He'll love wiping his butt on the old nag
and flushing her away!

Ex Husband Voodoo Doll - $13.00 -
Sale! $7.99
Front of the doll: Screw your prenup!, Send my
alimony, You take the kids, Give me more money, I want ALL!...not half, You pay
the mortgage, Quit showing up to PTA meetings drunk!, Get your clothes off the
lawn!, Admit you're wrong, stop lying about your affairs!, You pay all the legal
fees, Get out of the house!, I get the car. Back of the doll: I want the
child support, Quit hiding assets, Leave me alone, Stop yelling at me, No
visitation rights, You're paying the medical bills, You will be alone and never
love again, You pay off the credit cards, Stop your lawyer from calling me, Give
me back your ring, Pay off those back taxes, I get the house. Includes:
one voodoo doll with 25 and 10 pins

New Husband Voodoo Doll - $13.00 -
Sale! $7.99
Whenever you feel your new husband is taking you for
granted, use one of the pins to put him back in line. Stick the pin into the
activity that you want your husband to do and instantly he will return back into
the same caring man who convinced you to marry him in the first place. Has funny saying
like, "Make Dinner for Us," "Listen to Me," "Sex is over when I say it's over"
and "Buy Me Flowers." About 10" tall.

New Wife Voodoo Doll - $13.00 - Sale! $7.99
Whenever you feel your new wife is taking you for
granted, use one of the pins to put her back in line. Once the pin is inserted
she will return to the same caring woman you married. Has funny saying
like, "Take the damn trash out yourself," "Stop Nagging" and "Give me a B.J."
About 10" tall.

Bad Girlfriend Voodoo Doll - $13.00 - Sale! $10.00 Sayings
on front side of doll: Don’t use the “headache” excuse, Quit bitching, Show me
you love me, Stop nagging, Don’t criticize my friends, Get me a beer, Go to the
mall by yourself, Let’s have sex, Let’s have sex again, Stop spending money,
Let’s have fast food for dinner, Sex is over so you can go home now, Wear only
high heels to bed. Sayings on the back of doll: Don’t think about other
men, Don’t call me 10 times a day, Scratch my back, Don’t pester me on poker
night, Give me a “thorough” massage, Help me work on the car, Pop my back
pimples, Let’s go to an action movie, Let’s do it doggie-style, Stop eating like
you’ll never be single again, rub my stinky feet, Don’t kick my friends out.

Bad Boyfriend Voodoo Doll - $13.00 - Sale! $10.00 Whenever
you feel that your boyfriend is taking you for granted, use one of the
pins to put him back in line. Stick the pin into the activity that you
want your boyfriend to do, and instantly he will turn back into the same
caring man who convinced you to go out with him in the first place. Has funny saying
like, "Tell Me You Love Me," "Buy Me Jewelry," "Take me
Shopping"
and "Remember My Birthday." About 10" tall.
Boyfriend Training Flash Cards - $14.95
Starting all over? Do it right
this time! Not all boyfriends come
dating-ready--so give your guy a little basic training with these humorous flash
cards! They make it so easy to teach him those all-important relationship
dos-and-don'ts: on one side's an icon that captures the card's subject, and on
the other is advice on how to handle the problem. And they cover the essentials
in a way he'll instantly grasp, from putting the toilet seat down to opening
doors to (gasp!) handing over the remote control. Give him guidance on what's
appropriate conversation (telling you how great you look, for example),
acceptable mannerisms, and proper dress. In no time at all, he'll wow your
family, friends, co-workers...and YOU. 32 page booklet and 50 training
cards in a great retro designed flip top gift box.

Grow A Lover - $2.00 ea.
Just drop in a glass of water and your new companion grows up
to 600% it's diminutive start up size.
Chocolate Lover Boy & Lover Girl - $6.85 ea.
Lover Girl
made of the right stuff – sugar and spice, and chocolate too! She won’t
nag or make you go shopping. She has luscious lips, but doesn’t talk much.
She has sweet curves and wears edible panties. Chocolate Lover Girl goes down
easy. She’s fun to have around, but even more fun to get rid of. Your
friends will eat their hearts out while you eat your Chocolate Lover Girl.
Lover
Boy is a man made of the right stuff – delicious, semi-sweet dark chocolate,
that is. He'll fulfill your every need. He’s sweet. He’ll
stand by you and won’t cheat on you. He's
fun to have around, but even more fun to get rid of. But don’t worry. If
you wake up and find that Chocolate Lover Boy is gone, we have plenty more where
he came from!
Both
are shaped to look just like the characters on the gift package,
very detailed, 4 oz.
Little
Prick Award - $3.50
Perfect trophy to leave behind.
Black Long Stem Rose
Wrapped in black foil atop a long
stem with silk leaves. -
.75 ounces
Three Milk Chocolate Cigars - $6.50
These look incredibly real, perfect for any celebration.
3 ounces Kosher D - Gift boxed, tied
with stretch ribbon as shown.
No wholesale
Box of 12 Milk Chocolate Cigars - $21.99
These look incredibly real, perfect for any celebration. 12 ounces
Kosher D - Boxed as shown, no ribbon.

Party Survival Baseball Cap -
$13.00
Perfect for bachelor's last night out, birthday boys, Spring Break, break ups, Mardi Gras,
college frat party, etc. Just remove the middle button if it's not a
bachelor party. Adjustable blue cap.
Emergency First Aid Kit Vibe - $6.75 ea.
After he's gone, this
is a girl's best friend! Vinyl case holds the
cure to your most personal emergency! 4 1/2 inches takes 2 AA batteries.
Orgasm Keychain - $6.99 ea.
This little keychain sounds like a real woman carrying on and on in ecstasy!
It's really embarrassing and fun!

Hanging Party Shots - $2.50 ea.
Fun shot glasses for almost any
occasion. Pink from top line says: Hell Yes, Maybe, No. Blue
says: Married, Divorced, Single. Yellow says, Back Door, Front Door,
Oral. Plastic with black neck cord.

Divorce Card - $2.95
Outside - Heard about your divorce
Inside - No wonder they threw minute rice at
your wedding

Divorce Card - $2.95
Outside - There are two sides to a divorce.
Inside - . . .
Yours and the shithead's.

Divorce Card - $2.95
Outside - My best divorce advice: you get the ring . . .
Inside - . . .
He gets the finger!

Divorce Card - $2.95
Outside - Congratulations on your divorce! It's a new day. Now's the
time to broaden your horizons . . .
Inside - . . . and
start having orgasms again.

Divorce Card - $2.95
Outside - Congratulations on your divorce! You got him by
the balls!
Inside - Now enjoy using them as maracas.
Cha Cha Cha

Divorce Card - $2.95
Outside - You don't have one card that says Fuck You
and Die! Inside - Hope this card
brings a smile to your face during your divorce.

Divorce Card - $2.95
Outside - Good news, Mr. Townsend, your wife didn't
get everything. The judge said you could keep one testicle.
Inside - Wishing you all the best during your divorce!

Breakup/Divorce Card - $2.95
Outside - I'm a Marvelous Housekeeper.
Inside - Every time I leave a man I keep his house.

Breakup/Divorce Card - $2.95
Outside - The downside is they broke up, but the upside
is she lost 15 pounds from the devastation!
Inside - Sorry about your break-up, but you're looking fucking fabulous!
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